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Years ago, when I was at home from seminary for a few days, at about
2:00 A.M., I was suddenly startled awake by an ear shattering noise. A
huge wall mirror in my bedroom fell onto a tall lamp, shattering it, and
then hit the tile hearth in front of a fireplace that broke up the
mirror. The unexpected crashing sound scared me bolt upright in the
bed. I lost my sense of where I was and was as terrified as I can ever
remember being in my life. I ran into my parents, bedroom, who by then
were also awake, and jumped into bed with them. For several nights, I
could not sleep with the light off. When I went back to seminary,
several weeks went by before I could sleep all night without waking up
scared in the middle of the night. I finally got over it, but it taught
me how fear can capture and paralyze our minds.
Fear is a terrible enemy. Anxiety and fear can distract us from our
daily routine and can destroy our joy of living. Fear keeps many
homosexuals away from all supportive gay groups and from any
participation in encouraging activities, such as MCC. Many people have
told me when I was an MCC pastor that they drove to the church and sat
in the parking lot for several Sundays before they got courage to come
inside and risk being seen by somebody they knew. Fear saps our energy
and distorts our perception of reality. I have found, however, that
most of the things that I feared never happened. Fear makes us
vulnerable. Fear is never our friend. Fear causes pain and torment.
When "perfect love casts out fear," therefore, freedom and release are
overwhelming.
Jesus frequently greeted his friends with the salutation, "Don't be
afraid." See 1 John 4:1-21 for a wonderful expression of God's love
overcoming fear. "There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out
fear, because fear causes pain and torment. The one who is afraid is
not yet fully complete in love. We love because God first loved us."
(4:18-19) 1 John 4 is the Bible chapter that twice says: "God is love."
The inclusive love and teachings of Jesus in the Gospel of Luke
demonstrate also the theme of freedom from fear. See the "don't be
afraid" announcements by angels to Joseph (Luke 1:13 and in Matthew
1:20), to Mary (Luke 1:30), to the shepherds (2:10: "Do not be afraid;
for behold, I bring you good news of a great joy which shall be for all
of the people."), and to the women at the empty tomb (Matthew 28:5).
Jesus called Peter to become a fisher of people and said, "Don't be
afraid " (Luke 5:10). When parents were told that their child was dead,
Jesus said "Don't be afraid anymore," and raised the child from the dead
(Luke 8:50). When Jesus announced the equal value of all people, he
said, "Fear not, for you are of great value." (Luke 12:7).
Jesus said in John 14:27, "Peace I leave with you. My peace I give to
you is not like the world gives. Don't let your heart be troubled or be
afraid." The term "afraid" here is a word that means "timid" or "cowardly"
and was used for fear of wild beasts in the arena. Jesus makes you
brave. After the resurrection, Jesus appeared in John 20:19-23 with the
familiar greeting: "Peace be with you." The Holy Spirit was given to the
disciples to continue the mission of Jesus. Fear was replaced with a
mission from God.
Fear produces extra adrenaline, which gives your body a boost to help
you run away from danger. Fear can produce noticeable physical
problems, like uneasiness or a "knot in your stomach". Fear of being
bashed can equip you to run and escape. Fear of failure and fear of
what others will think or do to you produces fear in the form of
anxiety. The long-term pain of anxiety can limit and distract us and
reduce our ability to enjoy life. Paul said in Philippians 4:11 that in
Christ he had "learned to be content" in all circumstances. "Content"
means "self-rule" or "self control." Paul was at peace within himself
no matter how he was treated. He had learned to resist letting other
people determine and control his peace of mind. Even in prison, Paul
had learned how to feel good about himself under pressure. Read all of
Philippians 4.
Fear has been used to stir whole nations to war. Hitler used fear of
the communists and fear of the Jewish people and others to galvanize the
German people into a destructive war machine that left a path of
devastation and horror that humanity can never forget. Fear of
homosexuality and homosexuals is being used today in America to feed the
religious and political ambitions of unscrupulous leaders. One of the
main reasons for this book is to give accurate information that will
help dispel the fear of homosexuality ("homophobia") that hurts all
people, not just homosexuals.
The fear of sex has been fine tuned and greatly exaggerated in
homophobia. A new edition of George Weinberg's, Society and the Healthy
Homosexual, brings up to date the original definition of "homophobia,"
which Dr. Weinberg invented and first described in 1972. Homophobia is
the fear of homosexuality in yourself or in other people. Many of the
most homophobic people are closeted gay men. Fear of sex, especially
homosexual orientation, has grown into a formidable destructive force
when combined with fear of God. (See Troy Perry's book, Don't Be Afraid
Anymore.)
When people truly are convinced that someone is under the control of
evil or demonic forces, even the most terrible and destructive actions
are justified, even in the minds of the people who think that they are
possessed. Fear can blur the distinction between fact and fantasy.
Vampires, werewolves, zombies, homosexuals, and other movie monsters are
destroyed with dramatic violence "for their own good!" People have been
burned alive as witches, and multitudes of gay men and lesbians have
been subjected to electric shock therapy. As I write this, the murder
trial is in progress for the two men who tortured and killed a Matthew
Shepard, simply because he was gay. The extreme horror of the crime
sent shock waves and sparked outrage and hate crime legislation
throughout the nation. But it did not change the conviction of
homophobic religious fundamentalists, who remain sternly convinced that
God hates homosexuality as a sin.
Religion has been enlisted as a powerful weapon against homosexuals in
the "Ex-Gay" movement to judge, condemn, and then attempt to cure them
in the name of God. (See special study on "The Ex-Gay Fraud" at the end
of the book.) The American Psychiatric Association in October, 1998,
condemned the ex-gay therapy as a dangerous distortion of medical
practice that resulted in depression, despair, and suicide for many
people. Yet the "ex-gay" industry continues to grow and thrive with the
help and support of an army of preachers and churches.
Even the twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous have been perverted into a
misguided program for the "recovery" of homosexuals from their sexual
orientation in "Homosexuals Anonymous." This organization has added 3
additional steps to the 12 steps of AA. These extra steps bring
fundamentalist religious beliefs into the program and muddy the water
for many people who honestly seek help in facing life more effectively
as gay and lesbian people of many faiths.
Jesus came to set us free from fear. Freedom from fear of sexual
orientation is long overdue. Sexuality is a gift from God to be
celebrated and enjoyed. "You have not received a spirit of slavery and
fear, but you have received a spirit of adoption as children; for the
whole creation will be set free from its bondage to destruction into the
freedom of the glory of the children of God." (Romans 8:15, 21) Fear
and anger are the two most negative forces working against us. Jesus
gives us victory over both of them.
2. How have your fears changed as you have grown older? Make a list of
things you fear and ask God to set you free.
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Websites:
Steps to Recovery From Bible Abuse
Books:
Steps to Recovery from Bible Abuse
Why am I afraid to tell you who I am?
Why Am I Afraid to Love?
Or search Amazon.com for books related to GLBT people and Christianity.
Other Articles By Rembert Truluck:
When in Danger, When in Doubt, Blame God
Also In This Issue:
Scriptures, Homosexuality, and
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