You Might Be A Southern Baptist If...


  • You think John the Baptist started the SBC.

  • You think God's presence is strongest on the back three pews.

  • You think "Amazing Grace" is the national anthem.

  • You judge the quality of the sermon by the amount of sweat worked up by the preacher.

  • Your definition of fellowship has something to do with food.

  • You ever wondered when Lottie Moon and Annie Armstrong would get paid off.

  • You honestly believe that the Apostle Paul spoke King James English.

  • You think worship music has to be loud.

  • You think Jesus actually used Welch's grape juice and saltine crackers.

  • You judge the quality of a service by its length.

  • You ever wake up in the middle of the night craving fried chicken and interpret that feeling as a call to preach.

  • You believe that you are supposed to take a covered dish to heaven.

  • You have never sung the third verse of any hymn.


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