As I was getting ready to close up the church office for the Thanksgiving holiday, the usual raft of pre-holiday, pre-Advent thoughts were running through my mind — mostly centered around the perennial fistful of loose ends that never seem to get tied up in bows quickly enough, either for a person or a pastor, holidays or not. But it was time to go home, and I felt good about what I’d accomplished for the day.
Yet one thought, resurfaced as part of all this seasonal preparation and also sadly evergreen for me as someone who has spent decades in ministry, kept rising to the top: Why this time of year can be so hard for LGBTQ+ people, especially those of the Christian faith.
In my experience, it’s partly because at the same time that our faith reminds us to experience the same gratitude as everyone else, our LGBTQ+ identities still can seem to somehow get in the way — both internally and externally.
That’s because faith and identity, which are two integral aspects of who we are, can often feel like opposing forces for us — or at the very least, they can have a signal-to-noise ratio that is just never quite as low as for non-LGBTQ+ folks . And for far too many of us, these two parts of our lives simply collide and create conflict, leaving us to question whether we truly belong in the spaces that claim to be founded on love and acceptance.
But I am here to tell you, as a gay man and a pastor, that you do belong. Your faith is valid. Your identity is holy. Your life is a testament to the beauty of God’s creation.
There is a prevailing narrative in many religious spaces that suggests being LGBTQ+ is incompatible with faith, but that narrative is not the truth of God; instead, it’s the result of fear and misunderstanding. Scripture, when wielded as a weapon, has historically been used to exclude and silence us — yet when read through the lens of love, scripture actually vibrates with affirmations of inclusion.
For instance, the Bible tells us in 1 John 4:7-8:
Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.
Notice there are no conditions placed on this love — no exclusions, no footnotes. Love is love, and love is of God.
The idea that our identities could separate us from the Divine is not only erroneous but also deeply harmful. God doesn’t make mistakes, and God made you — your love, your joy, your very being — with intention and care. You are created in the image of God, fearfully and wonderfully, just as you are.
Far too many LGBTQ+ people have walked away from faith because they were made to feel unwelcome — or worse, unworthy. My grief over this is something I carry in my heart every day as a pastor. I have sat with those who were exiled from their church families, who were told they were “sinful” simply for existing as the people they were born to be.
Yet despite the rejection, so many of us still seek God. That is not a sign of weakness or naivety — it is a remarkable testimony to the strength and resilience of our spirits. To carry your faith forward in the face of adversity is an act of courage and grace.
For those who remain in our faith communities, we must reclaim our space at the table. Our love, our spirituality, our stories — these are vital parts of the body of Christ. If we are not represented in the sanctuary, the choir or the pulpit, then the church is incomplete.
To my LGBTQ+ siblings: Know that your existence is sacred. You bring light into this world in ways others cannot, and your presence within faith communities challenges them to grow in their understanding of who God is. The God I know is expansive and limitless, and God’s love moves far beyond the restrictive boxes that humans attempt to place it in. Your authenticity is an act of worship, your love a reflection of the Divine. Never forget that.
To the allies who stand with us: Thank you. Your advocacy and support matter more than you know. When you speak out against discrimination, share your affirming theology, or simply offer a safe space for someone, you are doing the work of Christ, who welcomed and loved all people. Continue to amplify marginalized voices and to educate others within your circles.
To my peers in religious leadership: This is a call to action. For too long we have seen LGBTQ+ people be hurt by the church. We cannot wash our hands of responsibility. It is not enough to passively hope for a better, more inclusive world. Silence on this issue only perpetuates the harm.
We must actively preach love and inclusion, educate ourselves on affirming theology, and open our churches to all of God’s children. True faith is not about enforcing conformity; it is about building relationships on the foundation of love.
There is still much work to be done, but my heart is filled with hope. Every time someone finds the courage to live authentically, every time a church becomes openly affirming, and every time a young LGBTQ+ person hears the words “You are loved, and you belong,” we are moving closer to God’s vision for humanity.
To LGBTQ+ people of faith, never forget that the same Spirit that hovered over the waters in creation lives within you. You are a reflection of God’s infinite creativity, and your life is a testimony of love’s power to overcome all things. Keep walking boldly in your truth and know that God walks with you every step of the way.
Editor-in-Chief of Whosoever and Founding and Senior Pastor of Gentle Spirit Christian Church of Atlanta, Rev. Paul M. Turner (he/him) grew up in suburban Chicago and was ordained by the Universal Fellowship of Metropolitan Community Churches in 1989. He and his husband Bill have lived in metro Atlanta since 1994, have been in a committed partnership since the early 1980s and have been legally married since 2015.