
Becoming Ex-Gay
Rev. Turner:Can I say something?
Yes, I'm a Christian and I believe in a way that I have lesbian feelings, but I STRONGLY believe that it is SO WRONG!!!!!! Whether or not you believe me it doesn't matter. If you claim to believe the BIBLE then you should believe all of it ... NOT JUST THE PARTS YOU WANT. IT'S CLEAR IN THE BIBLE HOW DISGUSTING it is in his eyes to such relationships. HE doesn't condemn YOU, BUT he condemns your (my) actions. I am a recovering lesbian and pray for strength to change my ways before the LORD comes to take 'his own' home. I want to be one of 'his own.' But with this life style, I will never be the Christian God wants me to be. I love you all. I'd love to talk to you but I don't yet have an address. But I'll be back.
My name?
Madeline (22yrs)
Dear Madeline,
I am going to assume your are not shouting at me with all the
capitalization in your letter since that, for a Christian, would be rude. So I will assume that all the
capitals are for emphasis since e-mail does not allow for bold
print. Otherwise I could not respond since I do not respond to being screamed at.
You say, "I believe in a way that I have lesbian feelings." What does
this mean? Have you had same gender sex? Have you experienced anything
more than just normal curiosity of what it is like to be with someone of the
same gender?
Of course whether I believe you or not about it being wrong is
important. It is important Madeline because you are a child of God and
what you are feeling and experiencing is in fact very important.
Madeline, it is not a matter of if I believe the Bible. I believe the
Bible is a sacred work that was inspired by God and written by people. I,
after years of study (about 25 years), have come to the conclusion that there
are mistakes in the translation of the Bible. By the way, I would raise
again as I have before -- which translation of the American Bible is the
word of God? Since there are 27 different translations out there, I would have
thought in your 22 years of life you might have figured out which one is the
absolute and final word of God.
HE doesn't condemn YOU, BUT he condemns your (my) actions. I am a recovering lesbian and pray for strength to change my ways before the LORD comes to take 'his own' home. I want to be one of 'his own.' But with this life style, I will never be the 'Christian God wants me to be.
Madeline, who told you this? Did God say to you that a loving,
committed and deeply caring relationship with a womyn was wrong. Did God
say that if you were a lesbian that you could change? Has God said that as
long as you don't have sex with the same gender, I won't harm you? Did God
come to you and say, "I hate what I have created you to be. So stop it!"?
No, Madeline, that wasn't God, but rather people who want to make a lot of
money scaring people like you into believing that loving another person
deeply and intimately is wrong. These people are the Pharisees of our
day. They are good marketers. They know how to make a buck. Blasting
homosexuals outright is no longer a popular thing to do, since the public is
figuring out the truth that GLBT people present no danger to society but
rather add to it. So they had to come up with a "softer and gentler"
approach: you can change if you just let God into your life. Then everything will be OK.
My dear sister in Christ, only those
who have been duped and emotional beaten into submission consider themselves
ex-gays. A little research shows that the desires and needs stay the same,
only the behavior changes. If the behavior has changed and not the heart, what has been gained?
What does it take to be a Christian? If my memory serves me correctly I
thought this was the only requirement: "For God had such love for the world
that God gave God's only Son, so that whosoever believes in him may not come
to destruction but have eternal life."
If you believe in the Christ then there is nothing in your sexual orientation
to change or remove. Your recovery needs to be from the slime that would
tell you that you are not a part of God's family not a recovery from yourself.
I will say this again to all who would say that Madaline has to or can
Change: There is nothing in all of scripture where God, Jesus or even
Paul condemns love and sex that is nurturing, caring, committed and
uplifting. The only sex that is ever condemned is that which is abusive and
without love or done for the purpose of worshipping a foreign God.
So, yes, I say to those who author, bankroll and market in a way of
selling used cars this sort of campaign to say there is the possibility of
being ex-gay: you are slime, because you know that you are lying. You
know there is no reason for a person to change who they love and care for.
You know we do not present a danger to you. You are just interested in
making a buck off of people like Madeline. Those who author, bankroll and
promote this ex-gay thing have become exactly what Jesus was talking about
when he said: "A curse is on you, scribes and Pharisees, false ones! For you
go about land and sea to get one disciple and, having them, you make them
twice as much a child of hell as yourselves. Even so you seem to people to
be full of righteousness, but inside you are all false and full of
wrongdoing. (Matthew 23:15 & 28).
If you think I am being harsh check with P-Fox (Parents and Friends
of Ex-gays). Ask them where their money is now. Ask them if the
authors of this movement are still with them, supporting them. Or did they
use them and throw them away like yesterday's garbage?
Child of God, the only thing that is required of you is to do justice,
act mercifully and walk humbly with your God, not change who you love.
God bless,
If you are seeking guidance and pastoral care on your journey to fullness as a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered person, please contact Pastor Paul directly at pastorpaul@whosoever.org.