Calvinists believe the game is fixed.
Lutherans believe they can’t win, but trust the Scorekeeper.
Quakers won’t swing.
Unitarians can catch anything.
Amish walk a lot.
Jehovah’s Witnesses are thrown out often.
Televangelists get caught stealing.
Episcopalians pass the plate.
Evangelicals make effective pitches.
Adventists have a seventh-inning stretch.
Atheists refuse to have an Umpire.
Baptists want to play hardball.
The Pope claims never to have committed an error.