Please don’t ignore me. I am here, and I am a part of the human race, but most people don’t know what to do with me, nor do they understand who I am. You see, I am asexual. Now, I admit, I’m not discriminated against. This is worse, I am ignored, or I’m told that there is someone out there for me. They don’t understand that maybe all I want is friendship.
The problem is that Kinsey didn’t put asexuality on his scale. Even he, with all his studies and asking people about their sexual orientation did not comprehend that there might be some who don’t want anything to do with sex.
Now, beyond that when I get into most groups, I am the ultimate outsider. In most groups, people around me are partnered with somebody, or have been. And most that I know, if they are single, are looking.
Even the people in churches don’t get it. Not even most of the folks who go to UFMCC really don’t understand that I don’t want a sex partner, I just want friends. The problem is that the fine folks of the churches usually are married or have partners. They don’t hassle me or put me down for being single and never being married, but they don’t understand me either. I do get some acceptance, but even in the churches, I find myself on the outside because there is not a group for me.
There was a pastor at a church where I’m a member who would talk about relationships and the difficulties that people have who are married. I never could make him understand that my questions about life and relationships are different because I’m single and don’t plan to be married or otherwise partnered. He kept telling me that what he was talking about could be reworded slightly to fit my situation.
So don’t ignore me, see me, I am here! Don’t turn your back or say that I’m wrong in saying that there’s no partner for me. Don’t ignore me, try to understand that being asexual is a valid sexual orientation. Don’t turn your back on me, be my friend, for that is what I want. Don’t ignore me, love me. I don’t need sex to know that I am loved, just hug me and agree to be around me.