Category Archives: Humor

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Safe in Church

The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before jerking it

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What Pastors Dream About

Here are some things that a pastor dreams of hearing in their church. 1. Hey! It’s my turn to sit in the front pew. 2. I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went 25 minutes over time. 3. Personally I find witnessing much

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A Cat’s View of Creation

On the first day of creation, God created the cat. On the second day, God created man to serve the cat. On the third, God created all the animals of the earth to serve as potential food for the cat. On the fourth day, God

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Do You Know the Way?

A little boy was waiting for his mother to come out of the grocery store. As he waited, he was approached by a man who asked, “Son, can you tell me where the post office is?” The little boy replied, “Sure, just go straight down

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Don’t Tell My Wife

A young preacher recently came upon a farmer working in his field. Being concerned about the farmer’s soul the preacher asked the man, “Are you laboring in the vineyard of the Lord my good man?” Not even looking at the preacher and continuing his work

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The Driving Pope

The pope flies to California to make a speech. He’s picked up in a limo and is being driven down the highway, when he thinks how nice it would be to do some driving himself. He rolls down the window and taps the driver on

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Rottweiler Jesus

Late one night, a burglar broke into a house that he thought was empty. He tiptoed through the living room but suddenly he froze in his tracks when he heard a loud voice say, “Jesus is watching you!” Silence returned to the house, so the

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Why Noah Missed His Ark Building Deadline

And the Lord said unto Noah: “Where is the ark which I have commanded thee to build?” And Noah said unto the Lord, “Verily, I have had three carpenters off ill. The gopherwood supplier hath let me down – yea, even though the gopherwood hath

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The Temperature of Heaven

The temperature of Heaven can be rather accurately computed. Our authority is Isaiah 30:26, “Moreover, the light of the Moon shall be as the light of the Sun and the light of the Sun shall be sevenfold, as the light of seven days.” Thus Heaven

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Throw It in the River!

A preacher, completing a temperance sermon, spoke with great fervor! “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d throw it all into the river.” With greater emphasis, he said, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d throw it all